Tag Archives: singles

Dear Future Husband, This is My Last Letter…

Hey baby!

I know you may not like the title of this blog but I gotta be honest..

This has been a long time coming.

Not that I write sooo many letters to you or anything; it’s simply time for me to get my mind and emotions together..

Although, this isn’t an easy task to do, it’s definitely necessary.

You see babe, this past year,

I lost myself

I stopped going out,

I stopped working out,

I stopped having fun,

I declined every invitation I’d gotten to hang out.

I stopped praying and spending time with the Lord.

I stopped getting my hair done.

My hands and feet are not painted as prettily anymore.

And honestly?

My bedroom became my best-friend.

Inside those four walls, I clung to loneliness. I succumbed to depression, and I allowed a stupid relationship status to suck me dry of all joy.

I went inside of this dark hopeless shell 🐚 and only stuck my head out when I thought 💭 I’d met you. As soon as I realized it wasn’t you? I went right back inside my protective shell and snapped at anyone who tried to come in.

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If one of my single sisters told me they’d finally met their King👑?

Oh, I congratulated them very well..

I celebrated them by rolling my eyes, raising my eyebrows and whenever one of them mentioned their boyfriends name or asked me to help with wedding plans I’d mumble jealous thoughts under my breath.

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Now, don’t get me wrong, I’d genuinely be happy for my sisters at first…

but then bitterness would set in…

Most days, I found myself feeling just like Hannah before she had Samuel. Penina being every other sister who’s raved about her fiance’ or asked me to help with wedding details KNOWING I’ve been single for almost 6 years…

hannah

Sometimes I got so angry, I sized my fellow sisters up from head to toe.

What makes her think she can get married before me?

I have wayyy more to offer a man than she does!

Who does she think she is?

(I know that sounds terrible).

but the reality is this is who I’d become…😞

And It’s horrible because,

THIS IS NOT ME!

Everyone who knows me knows,

  • I’m happy!
  • Cheerful!
  • Love Jesus with all my heart
  • Sweet
  • Caring!
  • Encouraging!
  • Have deep compassion for others.
  • Hilariously funny (If I do say so myself)
  • & fun to be around!

But waiting for you?

Especially this past year…

Has gotten the best of me.

So much so, I’d forgotten who I really was…

Then, a few weeks ago, something amazing happened and I was reminded of the woman God made me to be.

Early September, I was invited to a women’s church event. Although, I desperately wanted to decline and dreaded the invitation.

This time, I forced myself to go.

And a miracle happened while I was there!

Here I am, in the corner, wearing this big jacket, broken, busted, (looking like a homeless person) and The Lord prompts me to prophesy to a young lady..

I’m thinking 💭? How in the world can I prophesy to her when I’m depressed myself? Lord… why are you trying to use me like this? Look at me Jesus! Can you please lead someone else to speak to her? I begged.

Nevertheless, I listened to the Holy Spirit, walked over to the young lady and began to speak (telling her exactly what the Holy Spirit gave me). I hadn’t even finished the first sentence before this woman burst into tears. After I prayed with her, she opened up to me.

Turns out, she was on the verge of commiting suicide, and giving up on life completely. After the event, we exchanged numbers, and a week later I spoke with her again.

I could tell she was much happier than when I’d met her a week before! I could hear the joy in her voice! Then, just when I thought God had used me enough for His glory, she told me something wonderful happened to her the night I prayed for her.

She said, “Ms. Takyah, I don’t know why, but when you prayed for me I felt an urgency to throw away my pornography and other things I brought from the adult store.” She also said she felt a pulling from The Lord to start “living a pure lifestyle.”

Now, she doesn’t know that I have a call to “Purity” on my life, In fact, she knows nothing about me, except that I am a woman with big hair that prophesied to her.

Click here to order your very own copy of “Purity over PASSION!”

However, after that night and that conversation with her, I kicked myself!

Takyah!!! What are you doing??

God has need of you! Don’t you see why the enemy is trying to distract you and keep you  feeling the blues! He wants you to stay in your little bubble focused on what you don’t have instead of what you do have!

You are blessed! You are beautiful! You are a wonderful woman! Yes, the man who takes your hand 🤚🏽 will be very favored and fortunate, but you are more than his future wife!

You are a PROPHETESS!

You are a SINGER!

You are a WRITER!

You are an AUTHOR!

You are an ENTREPRENEUR!

You are an INVENTOR!

You are a FASHION DESIGNER!

You are a DAUGHTER!

An AUNTIE!

And a SISTER!

Although you may not be a mom or a wife yet, look at who you are already!

Since that day three weeks ago, I have taken control of my life! I’ve met a new girl-friend to hang out with who’s amazing! I’ve been spending time with God & reading His word like I used to! I’ve started working out again! I’ve even lost 11 pounds! I’ve been more positive and upbeat about life and situations!

And you won’t believe this!

I haven’t cried ONE night since I ministered to that young lady! Which is a very BIG deal, (Seeing how I was crying 😭 every other night thinking about you).

So, with that being said…

Future Husband,..

I am walking away from you 😌…

Completely

I cannot miss out on souls because I’m upset you aren’t here yet! I cannot miss out on destiny because I’m stuck in a bedroom idolizing marriage. I CANNOT ignore The Holy Spirit any longer because I’m too upset with God to hear His voice clearly.

I am saddened at my behavior, and wonder how many other times have I had my head in the clouds ☁️ thinking about you, that I missed out on a soul, or the chance to impact someone’s life for the better?

Through her eyes, I saw how much God has need of me.

And I needed that…

Although, I love the thought of you.

The thought of kissing 💋 you,

The thought of holding your hand as we walk on the beach 🏖,

The thought of cuddling 🤗 with you by the fireplace as I whoop you in a good card game🃏♠️ ,

The thought of your hands going…

😳 ehhh

sorry… I almost forgot this was a public blog…

tehehe (evil laugh)..

Anywho

Baby I lovvveee the thought 💭 of you…

I REALLY do…

But after 5 1/2 longgggg excruciating years of thinking about you, wondering when you’ll come, how will I know it’s you? So much and so forth…

I Just CAN’T do it anymore!

Over these past few weeks, I’ve been more happier than I’ve been in a long time, and now that I know what it’s like to feel that joy in my heart again…

I can’t give that up.

Not for You!

Not for Idris Elba!

Not for Chadwick Boseman! 🤤

or Anyone Else!

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Okay…

Maybe for Chadwick Boseman 🤔…

But certainly not for anybody else!

😂😂😂

And You know what babe?

It actually feels really good to tell you that!

So Yeah!!

Take that Future Husband!

In Your Face!!

lol..just kidding!

But, don’t lose heart babe! When I say I’m walking away from you; I’m still waiting for you as far as intimacy, sex and emotions go…

But waiting for you like I was at first?

Ughhhhhh 🤔

NO.

Lol.

I am getting back out there! I am about to live my life again! I’m going to keep worshiping The Father, singing, writing, prophesying and I will never lose sight of WHO I AM ever again!

Although, this is the last letter I’ll write to you or about you, until after we’re engaged 💍. (whenever that will be, don’t really care anymore 🤷🏽‍♀️) however, I want you to know that I love you..

So, so, so, so much…

This isn’t goodbye, it’s just, I must focus on the Lord 100% now, and leave the idea of you alone for good.

When it’s time for us to be together,

I know The Lord will do what He’s always done, and that’s come through with His Promises, right when I really need it..

Numbers 23:19 – “God is not a man, that He should lie,
Nor a son of man, that He should repent.
Has He said, and will He not do it?
Or has He spoken and will He not make it good and fulfill it?

See ya later baby…

Love,

You’re Future Wifey,

Xoxo 💋

👒 Takyah 👒

P.S. This is my favorite gospel song of all time! I thought you might like to hear it:

Dear, Blind Married Couple…

Hey there ladies and gents!

This is your girl Takyah! Coming at you with a fresh order of deep thinking🤔.

Tonights deep thoughts will be served with a side order of anger 😡, topped off with hunger 😫 and sprinkled with just the right amount of crazy meds💊🤪.

I don’t know if it’s the medicine or what…

But I have been thinking very deeply and listening to Bobby Womack since this morning.

For those of you who don’t know, I had surgery earlier this morning and my mouth has been bleeding ever since! Not to mention I had to get stitches, because one of my gums ripped during the extraction. So, yes, I am in alot of pain.

Unless, of course, I take the medicine my doctor prescribed.

But, I haven’t been able to take the pain medicine properly because I haven’t eaten since 5 a.m. this morning.

And that!

ladies and gentlemen, is what inspired me to write this blog..

I’m lying in bed, sore & in pain, bleeding everywhere and no one is free to pick up soup for me to eat. My mom just left the house to go somewhere but I don’t think it was for soup…😢

Any way…

In my new blog, “Dear, Blind Married Couple” I’d like to discuss people who are blindly married and don’t realize how blessed they truly are.

To the ungrateful married woman & self-absorbed husband, I am coming for both of you, in this rendition of “Late Night Thoughts With Takyah” blog style.

⭐️NOTE TO READER: This is coming from a single woman who is on medication, hungry and in a lot of pain.⭐️

Now, I’m not using that as an excuse to get out of character, but you know what they say…. 👀

You’re not you when you’re hungry…

With that being said, this blog will not be nice.

Alright… ladies and gents,

Let’s get started!

First off, I’d like to start tonight’s blog off by saying two simple words…

SHUT UP!

You ole’ nagging wife!

Your husband pays the bills,

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Keeps a roof over your family’s head

Goes to work everyday,

Rubs your feet when their hurting,

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Pulls up the car for you when it’s storming outside ☔️ (so you don’t get wet in the rain)

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And been faithful to you and only you.

He’s nothing short of a God-sent superhero husband!

He opens up doors for you so much that if you stood at a door 🚪 (without him opening it), you probably wouldn’t even know how to turn the freakin’ handle.

He pays for you to get your hair done, your nails done, as well as all those random shopping sprees you and your girls like to have.

Not to mention how he caters to you and makes you feel in the love department…

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He’s also a man who cares for you, and gives you the best wisdom in all your “I’m about to go Loca!” moments.

You know what else he does?

He sits, and listens to your random rants, whether he wants to hear them or not.

And even after you’ve hurt his pride by comparing him to Tina’s husband, He’s still brainstorming ideas and trying to come up with the next thing he can do to make you happy.

When you needed help opening up all those stupid airtight pickle jars, he was right there! All big and strong like Tarzan! Ready to do anything you asked. You used to praise him for his efforts and call him your Hero.

But now?

Hmm

He’s just not that important to you anymore huh?

That’s because you take him for granted, you selfish, nagging wife..

It’s almost as if you forgot who he truly is..

A KING,

Your KING.

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Oh, and let’s not forget you,

You arrogant husband!

And how unappreciative you are towards the woman who cooks for you

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Cleans the house for you,

Has your clothes washed, folded and Starched clean so you can look sharp everyday.

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Let’s not forget how she has to get a job every now & then to help out with the bills because, although you make a lot of money, you’re not so frugal when it comes to it..

Oops did I say that?

Hmm… I guess I did!

The wife you are so unappreciative of, has to work, get home from that job, get the children ready, feed you, feed them, clothe them, clothe you and send you all off to work and school happily every morning.

 After all of that chaos, she then tries to get some “Me-Time” but realizes “Oh no, I can’t today because my husband wants me to go run a couple errands for him! Or, “I promised the kids I would have lunch with them today!”

Me time will just have to wait for another day she says.

Yet “Me time” never comes. But I guess as long as dinner is on the table by the time your favorite football team comes on, you could care less about her getting the time she needs to rejuvenate her soul, mind and body.

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You never take the time out to spend with your wife or listen to her, you reject her continuously in the areas of “quality time”, yet you want her to be ready to make love to you whenever you feel like it.

Pssh….. give me a break.

Your wife changed her hair color, lost 20 pounds and even tried this new lipstick color just so you could call her beautiful like you used to when the two of you first started dating,

And what did you do?

Nothing.

You walked right past her and didn’t even open your mouth.

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Some nerve you got?

Comparing her to all those superficial women, while you yourself have a belly that sticks out worse than a busted lip.

She, your beautiful wife, stood by you when you were sick, broke & helped you become the very man that you are today and you have the audacity to think you could have married someone better…

I’d love to see how fast one of those pretty little models you like so much, leave you as soon as you get sick, or can’t walk.

Let’s see how long one of them will stay?

“Christina?”

That’s right! Two seconds and she’s gone Charles!!!

What’s my point in all of this?

My point is, if you are married, wishing you could be single,…

Shut up and make it work with your spouse because honestly,

As selfish, arrogant, and undeserving as you sound,

You wouldn’t last one day as a “Real Single

Although you think it’s so much easier, I beg to differ. True singleness is not selfishness. In fact, true singleness has the same purpose that marriage does, and that is to be holy like Jesus Christ and serve the Father.

I’m not talking about “single people” who have 10 different partners and sleep around every weekend, neither am I referring to the ones that have 8 Bae’s they call “Boo”.

Oh no sweetie…

I’m talking about a real single….

A single godly woman who actually lives what she preaches,

Who by the way, is lying in the bed right now with gauzes in her mouth, angrily hungry because there is no one to get soup for her!

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No bae to call, no boo to text.

But a real “Waiting on God’s best for me” single woman.

Not a fake woman of God, who keeps abusing the grace message, so she can keep throwing it back for every man of God that steps to her.

Oh, no…I’m speaking of a real single who has kept herself to herself and is BEYOND sexually frustrated!

Who’s also, extremely upset because while she was running in the rain, her stupid umbrella broke and flipped upside down! Causing her whole head to get drenched!

And guess what’s coming next if she doesn’t hurry up and get out of these wet clothes?

A nasty cold…

And guess who’ll help nurse this single woman back to health if that happens?

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Exactly…

Yes, I’m talking about a real single..

A woman who pumps her own gas ⛽️, shovels her own snow during the winter time; who almost messed up her car, cause she put the windshield fluid in the wrong hole/pipe or whatever you call those stupid things under the hood!

If you’re ungrateful.

and married to the person you once swore was the love of your life.

My word for you tonight is,

S-H-U-T  U-P!

Yes, being single has its freedom and perks, but lets not forget all the downs it has as well. “Focus on God” all the married women advise, while they go home to a warm bed with big arms to hold them at night and a big chest to sleep on.

You’re not loving yourself enough!”

You need to find out who you are first then you can love a man properly!”

“Enjoy you some you time before you get married.”

Just shut- up! I’ve done all those things already!

If I love myself any more, I’ll be standing here looking like this “coo-coo” bird who married herself a few years ago.

married herself

How much prayer did you pray to become an ungrateful wife?

How much anointing do I have to have to be a wife like you?

Oh do tell, you nag of a married woman, who complains every 5 seconds about her husband.

I would love to see you last a month without being able to touch a man. Try 5 years going on 6 next May..

Cry yourself to sleep for months on end,

Wake up in the middle of the night wanting to do what your body naturally wants to do and refuse it!

Go years sitting at a restaurant table by yourself eating alone.

Then come back and give me advice…

I swear I wish I could do this to all of you ungrateful married folk!

Married women, shut up.

Married men, shut up.

Listen to Bobby Womack, and while you’re listening to him, I want you to look at your spouse and realize one thing for me tonight..

Just how blessed you are

Sign,

The Real Singles,

Who are frustrated, angry, pissed off to the highest level of “PISSTIVITY”, hungry, and VERY MUCH anointed women and men of God!

Goodnight!

***Update: 9:00 P.M.***

Ahhhh my mommy did get me Potato soup! Two bowls of it! One for tonight and one for tomorrow! I love her so much! Thanks ma! 🙂

Three Ways to Know if a Man is “Heaven” sent or “Hell” sent.

Its amazing to see and hear some of the explanations that women give just to hold onto a man. Even when all the signs are telling you he’s not the one. I’ve counseled women, went into debates (not purposely) and even had to slap a few of my “Christian Sistas” back into reality when it came to dating a man!

Through their personal experiences I have witnessed, “bad break-ups, Love stories that quickly went sour, and the situations I grieve the most…My Sista’s who fall into sin because this time the devil came talking the bible and wearing a church suit.. So, before you get all “lovey dovey and “I’s fina get married now!”  I want to share with you, Three Ways to Know if a Man isHeaven” sent or“HELL” sent!

1. Hell sent: “Confusion”

Confusion: chaos; lack of clearness; a disturbed mental state.

Any relationship that confuses you is not of God! One of the many promises that we, as children of God, have a right to obtain is peace! So, why in Heaven,…. would “GOD“(our loving daddy) send us a mate who is just downright confusing???

Let me show you what I mean

  • His mood is ALWAYS changing: *meaning he’s very unstable and incapable of running a family.
  • You feel no peace when you’re with him
  • He’s confuses you about what he wants in a relationship: *one day he’s speaking marriage and the next, he pretends as if he doesn’t even know you.
  •  You break up and make-up: *although we understand that relationships are (not perfect) and disagreements will happen; however they should not occur on a daily basis.
  • He tells you he’s “waiting on God”: *Yet, he wishes to drag you along for years; as he waits on”Gods Big Answer” Which for a lack of better terms, is simply (a man afraid of any real commitment)

Now, I don’t know about you…but Chile’…That is just “toomuch confusion for me!

“Ain’t Nobody Got time fo’ dat!”

⭐️The bible says in •1 Corinthians 14:33“God is not the author of confusion but of peace.”  And ladies…Instead of ‘jumping the gun‘ and allowing (temporary emotions) to cloud your judgement. How about nexttime *practice patience!* and give your new found love,” time to reveal his true character…

Okay! Let’s move on!

2. Hell sent: “Apples and Oranges”(THE RELATIONSHIP DOES NOT FLOW!)

Flow: moving in or as in a stream; like “flowing water”; something that proceeds smoothly.

I remember last Autumn; sitting in one of my favorite places to eat! Gus’s fried chicken! Yummy!!! 🙂

I was cordially invited over the phone to have lunch with a (guy) friend of mine.

So, here we are, having a casual lunch, catching up on whats been going on in our lives, and all of a sudden I hear him say…

“Takyah, I think you’re my wife.” 

Inside my head I scream,

“DARN YOU GUS’S FRIED CHICKEN!!”

😂😜(I guess that’s what I get for loving food so much!)😜😂

Now, onto a more serious note.  

After a few moments of gathering my thoughts. What exactly? would I say to this man to convince him that , I am NOT his wife! Still to this day I can’t figure out how he came to that conclusion…🤔

For one thing…..

We have absolutely NOTHING in common…I am apple’s🍎 and he is oranges🍊

Let me show you a few examples of what I mean:

My Personality:

  • laid back, (mostly quiet)
  • hate arguments (I always want things to go smoothly)
  • funny (I love having a good time)
  • romantic (but I’m saving all of those “romantic” ideas for hubby)
  • giving (I don’t know, what it is, but I just love giving to people!)
  • I lovemusic (especially old school)
  • I enjoy cooking
  • I love deep conversations (especially about God)
  • and I lovereading books

Now let me show you his personality…

*But before I do this, please know; “I am trying to be as honest as I can without hurting any feelings, but for the sake of my ladies, I will not sugar coat anything! They will get thewholetruth!  AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH!!  

(Now back to the comparison chart) LOL…

His Personality:

  • extremely hyper
  • He loved talking (but it was never deep)
  • He wasn’t romantic (AT ALL!!!)

 Like do you see this picture below?? “Chile’ pleaseee(in my southern accentthat wouldn’t happen in a million years!

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Even when I cooked for him, as a friendly gesture, he never thought to say “thank you” “give flowers” or anything along that nature! He Just CameAte. Burped and left. Leaving me as a woman feeling unappreciated.

Not only that; but can you believe as we were eating, this man pulls out his phone and begins to talk…and it wasn’t your (“Hey, I’m busy can you call me back?”) type of conversation… Oh no, that’s understandable.  

It was one of those…

 (“MAN WHAT???!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT! DIDN’T I TELL YOU THEY WAS GONE LOSE THE GAME!) kind of conversations….

I believe had I not pulled the “I’m sleepy routine” we would still be at dinner now.

  So, do you see what I’m saying?

If the relationship doesn’t flow, let him go! 

Point. Blank.Simple.

Okay….

Last but most certainly not least!  This sign all by itself will let you know, how you as single woman can know 100% that this man did not come from God…

3. Hell sent: Compromising to be with him

Compromise: to make a dishonorable or shameful concession; a compromise of ones integrity.

  • “Sex doesn’t sound too bad. right? I mean, after all we have grace.”
  • C’mon girl! You know we gonna’ get married! So, don’t try to be all holy on me! “Why you tryna’ hold out?”

One thing that, we as “single women” must always be prayerful and watchful for is wolves in sheep’s clothing!  

Ladies… If you pay attention and take off the blinders (your emotions and hopes) It usually doesn’t take long to spot these kind of men…especially when you have discernment. Men who are only after one thing, can very well disguise themselves to look like they’re everything you’ve ever wanted.  They’re extremely charming, suave, funny and for some ODD reason these kinds of men always leave your mind wondering…

but the devil is a liar!  

Sista’, you better get to’ rebuking your mind and praying for discernment! Before you be looking like the girl in this picture…

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  • 1. He asks you things like “what turns you on physically?”  (Such as: kissing, rubbing your neck (etc.)
  • 2. He’s always commenting about how “sexy” you look (How big your butt is or how wide your hips are) He never compliments your inner qualities. It’s always on the outside.
  • 3. He blurts out things like: “Girl if you was my wife, I would have you all over the place!” (Which by the way ladies, is not a compliment but is very inappropriate. (If you’re not married.) For one thing you’re not his wife and secondly he should not be looking at you in that manner!

⭐️Matthew 5:28 lets us know that “anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

  •   4. He texts you,”What are you wearing right now?” (The next time he texts you something like that, tell him you got on the full armour of God! I bet you that devil will stop texting then.)
  •   5.He never asks you out on dates

Although, I hate to rain on your parade, I have to share with you, “Men are natural investors by nature. So, if he’s not pursuing you, by investing any money or time into the relationship,  Just know you’re not the one he wants!

⭐️Note: Men who want more, do more! And. NO! Ma’am! Every single date WILL NOT be in secret!

So, there you go LADIES….and GENTS (who came out of curiosity!)

I pray that my blog helped you!

Feel free to comment and also share any tips that you might have yourself on, “How to spot HELL sent relationships!”

Love you all!!!!
💋Takyah Love