Today, December 25, 2019 would’ve been my 1st Christmas with a Husband.
A long awaited day that I had been dreaming of for the past several years was finally about to come true.
I would cook us a Christmas dinner,
- Turkey 🦃,
- Greens 🥬,
- Candied Yams,
- Sweet Potato Pie,
- Hand crafted Peach Tea and all. 😊
We would exchange gifts, play a few games, (Me Whooping him terribly of course) 😅.
And after the festivities?
I imagined we would cozy up by the fire, (if we had a fire place) drink hot cocoa with marshmallows, and just talk…
Such A Joy that would be…
Yep, I really thought 2019 would be my year.
God knew it wouldn’t be.
At least not for marriage, that is…
To be Honest,
I’m happy it’s not!!!
When waiting on a promise from God,
we get tired of waiting,
tired of fasting,
tired of believing,
and ladies if I’m being honest…
WE just get plain old tired of constantly praying for a man who seems to have a broken watch & not know his cue’ was like 5 chapters ago 🤦♀️.
And, in that “tiredness”
we give up.
We try to take matters into our own hands, (as if we’re God) & we end up getting somebody (we know good-n-well is not our God ordained spouse) and try to make it work with them.
is what I almost did this year.. 😔
I was so tired of God’s timing that,
I was willing to give up part of my ordained destiny for a temporary satisfaction.
*Whew! 😓 That’ll preach!*
Even though, God was gently saying,
“That’s Not it Takyah.“
Or, “I have better for you daughter.“
I kept disobeying His instructions…
And the question is,
Like, seriously y’all?
Why are we in such a RUSH (as a generation) to make it across an imaginary finish line?
What are we trying to Prove and who are we trying to prove it to?
Are we trying to win the “Who will get married first game?” that we’ve made up in our own little heads?
Is it the ticking of a biological time clock ⏰? (for those of us who want to start families)
Or is it simply because, we’re tired of friends & family members asking us every Holiday, when are we getting married?
Whatever the reason,
it’s NOT worth disobeying God…
I know this is probably not what you wanted to hear on Christmas,
but I gotta be honest.
We cannot allow ourselves to get in a place that’s so low and so lonely; we accept anything with legs that calls itself a help mate.
We must do better!
Better at holding one another up in our weak moments!
Better at being there for one another!
And better at pointing one another to Christ when we go through various temptations and tests.
(I am preaching to myself as well!)
The greatest lesson I’ve learned this year (in regards to relationships), is that we cannot put anyone in the place of our Husband, just because we’re tired.
It truly is a Sacred,
“GOD chosen” position.
& trust me when I say,
God has absolutely NO problem coming in and tearing stuff up, (to make sure we wait on who He has for us!) Especially, when He knows we’re making dumb decisions in our vulnerability.
The place of our Husband is “Ordained.”
And the timing to meet this man, (from God’s standpoint) will be The Perfect Timing.
And just like a tailored suit,
you will be perfectly Cut.
Just. For. Him.
He’s going to manifest as every prayer you’ve ever prayed,
every dream you’ve ever dreamt,
and every tear you’ve ever cried!
And AFTER receiving HIM…
The “REAL HIM“
It’s going to make so much sense why it didn’t work with anyone else.
All those lonely nights you didn’t let someone toxic get in your bed, (because you knew you deserved more.)
All those times you said “No” to numerous date offers (because you wanted “the will of God”) instead of any ole thing!
God HAS NOT forgotten any of it!
But for now Ladies,
My only request is that you focus on Jesus, your career and your passions!
Allow yourself to fall madly in love ❤️ with Jesus, get in His presence! Let Him Fill you up with His Word and mend every broken piece of your heart!
The last thing you want to do is go into a marriage carrying toxic leftovers & fears from your past relationships with you.
Your Future Hubby deserves more than that.
& Whatever you do,
PLEASE, don’t allow the frustrations of life,
cause you to SETTLE!
I know you’re tired, I know you’re weary, I know you’ve had enough, and every Holiday season Seems to be worse than the last.
But, at what costs do you want to be married sis?
My frustrations almost got me to make THE biggest mistake of my life!
Although, it would’ve been my FIRST CHRISTMAS with “A“ mate, he was not “MY MATE” from God..
Sure, I would’ve been able to have SEX.
Sure, I would’ve been able to say the H-U-S-B-A-N-D word.
But who’s life would I have altered through my disobedience?
How many people would be affected by one stupid decision I made while I was emotional, angry at someone else (if I’m being honest), bitter or trying to prove I’m worthy enough to be a Wife?
God already knows I’m worthy & that I’ll be a wife oneday! That’s why He placed the desire within me. And I’m Going to be a dang-on good wife! Ya heard me? (lol sorry, Memphis slang coming thru.)
However, the time for me to be “that wife” will be when God is ready for me to be that.
Yes it hurt, when God snatched this man out of my life, (& I had to call off our engagement only a few weeks after being proposed to) but just like a Bee 🐝 sting, the pain was Temporary.
So what 🤷🏽♀️, I can’t cook for a man wearing something cute!
I can cook for my family! 👨👩👧👦
So what 🤷🏽♀️ if I have to wait a little bit longer before I can “do the do.”
I’ve waited YEARS! Trust, I can wait some more.
So what 🤷🏽♀️ if I can’t say things like, “MY HUSBAND & I” are going to do blah, blah, blah,.
Who Am I competing with??
I’d rather be married to my (ordained Spouse) than to be married to the wrong person just so I can say a stupid title.
And NOW that I look back, only 4 months after our relationship ended, I am SO HAPPY The Lord shielded 🛑 me from what I thought I wanted!!
So, to the beautiful ladies in waiting,
🍷 I’d like to make a toast…
Another Christmas🎄 Alone = ALL IN ONE! 😊😉
Surrounded by Friends,
Surrounded by Family,
Celebrating our Lord Jesus Christ!
To another year of mess ups and getting out of the will of God,
& Another Year of God loving us so much, that He snatches us right back up and Gently places us back in His will. (lol)
To MY Second Failed Engagement💍 ! (They say 3rd Times the Charm right?) 😂🤷🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
Here’s to getting one step closer to our destinies, and God guarding MY love life like a hawk guarding some food it’s about to eat for dinner!! 😑
To Another year of being Beautiful, Whole & Single…
🎁Merry Christmas My Loves!🎁
Until next time!
Oh and P.S. If you guys haven’t heard my Christmas song, here’s the link!! It’s fye🔥!!
Don’t forget to subscribe to my youtube channel!!!
Okay bye y’all!!! Have a Merry Christmas!!!! 🎁🎄