Hey Ladies!!

I miss talking to you girls so much!

There are SO many things I want to tell you thats happened in my personal life since my last blog!

However, I’ll wait to spill all those juicy details when The Lord gives me permission ☺️.

Okay..

As we all know, cuffing season has officially begun!

cuffing

With that being said,..

Starting a new relationship around this time of year can be tricky if you don’t know what to look for in a good man.

With the Holidays right around the corner and men dishing out their best “smooth criminal lines.” It can be difficult to discern if a man is really interested in you or if he just wants to stay warm for the winter.

Today, I will be giving tips on how you yourself can spot a man who’s worthy of your time and worth keeping around.

(Even after the Holidays have passed).

christmas

1. He Does What He Says

The number one sign you’re dating a great man is that he often does what he says.

The reason I said often is because we do know things happen and plans can change due to situations that are beyond our control.

However, a man who breaks his promises and cancels on you consistently is a man who doesn’t value you.

When a man loves you, or is interested in you sis, HE WILL SHOW YOU! A lot of guys talk a good game, but the man who backs up his words with actions; is definitely a keeper.

⭐️NOTE: A man’s love for you lies in his actions not 🚫 his words.

2. He Compromises

What really sets a man apart from all the rest, is his ability to compromise.

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If a man is willing to admit his mistakes, and find a solution to how he can make things right or better for the two of you.

Hold on to him sis!

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Men disappoint women, and women disappoint men. We’re all human and we all make mistakes. A person’s character isn’t revealed when they make a mistake. It’s what one does AFTER making the mistake that matters most.

If a man does something that you didn’t like and he puts his pride aside to make things right with you, that speaks V-O-L-U-M-E-S to his character and let’s you know he won’t be the type of husband that runs every time a problem surfaces.

But, if a man shuts down & runs away every time you confront him about something he’s doing that hurts you.

Think about where you want this relationship to go sis?

Do you really want to be married to a man who:

  • always thinks he’s right,
  • never compromises
  • & never even takes the time to hear you out?

If he’s running away from you now & avoiding his wrongs in the courting stage, just imagine how he will act if the two of you get married!

⭐️NOTE: Also, make sure your relationship is a safe haven for him to express himself!

Another reason men don’t like admitting when they’re wrong is because women have a tendency to rub their noses👃🏾 in it!

When a man is wrong and he apologizes, accept his apology and MOVE ON! Do not sit there talking about what he did for days on end! Doing that makes it so much harder for him to come and talk to you the next time.

3. He Points You to Christ

A trait that is beautiful yet so rare these days, is a man who knows how to give a woman back to The Lord!

Praying-Together-Creating-Unity-and-Trust

There is this song called: “Lord I Lift Her Up” by T.D. Jakes and I absolutely love it!

In this song, the man is telling his woman:

Baby I love you. I will hold you in my arms, I will kiss you and let you cry on my chest when you need to, but I am not GOD. In this song, the man is praying to the Lord about the woman he loves, and he’s lifting her up to the Lord in prayer so she can find true peace. Peace he realizes only The Lord can provide for her.

A man from The Lord, will want you to be as close to The Father as he is. He will not come into your life to distract you, nor will he try to take your mind off the things of God.

If you’re dating a man who loves The Lord and leads you to Christ when times get rough, he is a man that is nothing short of Amazing.

worshipping-man

Okay ladies, here we are at our last point!

And if your man does this?

Let me know right now, so I can get hooked up with his brother!

lol j/k.😜

Any who…

A good sign to know if a man is really worth keeping is if,

4. He Does Chivalrous Things for You

Chivalry: courteous behavior, politeness, especially that of a man towards women.

Buying you flowers for no reason, Opening up doors for you, and calling you to make sure you made it home safely after a date,

is not old fashioned,

it’s beautiful.

There was this story on Instagram I saw the other day and I literally cried when I saw it. This young man was interested in this woman and although I don’t know the full story,  

I don’t have too! 

Simply the way he asked her out was enough for me to know he truly cares for her! Oneday, he walked her to her car, and after she’d gotten settled in he popped this big “Can I Court You?” sign out.

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I read his post, and found out the brotha spent 4 whole hours making the sign alone.

His reasons were, “I just wanted it to be perfect for her.”

A few months after she said yes to being his girlfriend, she has now said yes to being his wife!

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⭐️NOTE: Men always put forth effort for a woman they really like!

We as women settle for so many things when it comes to dating, but one thing we should never settle on is how we allow a man to treat us.

If he’s not being chivalrous towards you. (Or not even attempting), more than likely, he probably doesn’t think you’re worth the effort.

Think about it sis…

Do you think, a man who’s been waiting a long time to date a particular woman will just treat her any kind of way when she gives him the opportunity?

Uhm.. No!

I guarantee! That man will be pulling all kinds of tricks out of his hat to make sure the woman he adores is impressed.

Please don’t settle for the okey dokey!

If a brotha is not answering when you call, treating you like an OPTION, and doesn’t mind letting doors slam in your face. Chances are, you’re not the one he wants to be with.

However, if it’s been years and he’s still treating you with tenderness & love, KEEP HIM sis!

Chivalry in a man is rare!

Alright Ladies!

I’m out of here! I gotta head out to my girls Bridal Shower!

I hope you all enjoyed the blog!!

Until Next time!

Takyah Love 😘

Did the Lord tell you who your husband was?

If so, how did he do it?

  • Did he tell you in a dream?
  • A vision?
  • Did you hear an audible voice?

Or was it all your Flesh???

Now I know this can be a touchy subject; nevertheless, this is an issue that must be discussed!

In today’s blog: “Back Off! The LORD said, He’s my Husband!” I will be coming at you with the ulfiltered truth. And just like any other day, I want you ladies to listen & take what I am about to share with you into consideration; even if I step on your toes a little bit…👀

                            Okay Ladies…

                           Let’s get started.

1. Do You SEE Me Now?

One thing I know for sure, is that

God will never tell you a man is your husband & then have YOU pursue HIM!

The Bible says in:

  • ⭐️ Proverbs 18:22-“He that finds a wife finds a good thing, & {when he finds her, he obtains favor from the Lord.}”

What I believe the scripture is saying, is that it’s the mans job to come find us, pursue us, & if God allows it, conquer us. (Meaning court you & put a ring on your finger, because he knows your worth.) 

Yet, there are so many women in the wrong role; acting as if they are the pursuer! Sis, you don’t need to chase down🏃🏽‍♀️a man to get favor from God!

You are the FAVOR and THE GOOD THING!

Just last summer, I met a young woman, who was on fire for God! She was highly anointed, beautiful & someone I deemed to be very powerful! We talked a few times & I was told there was this man at the conference she had a crush on..

However, what started out as an innocent crush… has now transpired into a downright obsession! When I last ran into her, (which was quite recently), I hugged her and noticed immediately she was not the same “fireball” I’d met almost a year ago.

In fact, where I last saw joy & smiles, I was now seeing confusion & heartache.
I couldn’t help but feel sorry as I watched her skip once more to the front row, hoping this would be the day the man she’d secretly fallen for, would finally “See” her as his wife.

Ladies…I hate to be the bearer of bad news.. but that…

IS NOT GOD’S WILL FOR YOUR LIFE!!!

⭐️NOTEGod, would never put you in a situation that would drain the very life & peace he’s given you! (just to be noticed by a man.)

This woman was so focused on this man being her husband, that she couldn’t even focus on her own life & what The Lord had entrusted her with. Instead of spending her single season doing what “The LORD” wants her to do. She’s spending her days, following a man from city to city & allowing the enemy to steal precious time from her life!

⭐️NOTE: God will not give you a man that will become an Idol for you. (Someone that you praise & glorify yet neglect your relationship with Christ in the process.)

Ladies, b-e-l-i-e-v-e me when I say this,

The man God has for you… 

WILL SEE YOU!

*naturally.*

When God brought Eve to Adam, he was in a deep sleep, but when his eyes were opened; the first thing he said was, “WHOAH! MAN!” as the late Dr. Myles Munroe stated it! 😅

Then, after Adam saw her; the very next thing he wanted to do was be with her & cleave to her!

Ladies, that right there is PROOF you don’t have to force anything!

Once God presents you to your true husband, it will be something about you that will stand out to him! (maybe your smile, your spirit, or just the fact he can’t stop thinking about you.) Even if he’s not able to put his finger on (*what it is about you*)

God will help him figure out that puzzle piece.

& He can definitely do it,

WITHOUT   YOU!!!

2. The Man/Woman of God told you so!!

Lord Have Mercy…if I had a nickel..for every time I heard this, I’d be the nickel queen 👸🏽wearing a nickel coat by now…

It was 2015. Around the second quarter of the year. I’d been awakened with a dream about this young Evangelist who’d previously came to my church & prophesied to me.

Because I did not understand the dream at the time. I told the dream I’d dreamt of him to a highly discerning woman of God.

(Because I trusted her counsel)

When I finished telling her all the dreams I’d had of him, she smiled from ear to ear & said, “Takyah, he’s probably your husband.” My response was, “What?!” She then replied, “Mhhm… I believe he is.

After I told her so many reasons as to why I clearly knew this man was not my husband & how those dreams had to mean something else; she stated a case that sounded so good I almost fell for it!

However, because of that check🤔 in my spirit, I politely rejected that interpretation & went on about my business.

6 months Later…

One winters day as I was sitting at my computer desk getting ready to post something on Facebook, this big picture popped up on my timeline announcing a wedding.

It read:

💍💍You are invited to come out and celebrate with us! We’ll be tying the knot! 

May 7, 2016 💍💍

 And guess who was on this picture??

A beautiful young lady smiling from ear to ear, with, “The Man of God” (who was supposedly supposed to be my husband)

   Ladies, do you see why this is so dangerous? 

Just because, “Mother Mable” or your Pastor tells you that “so and so” could be your husband; doesn’t mean you go & try to bring that word or prophecy to pass!

Another one of my favorite scriptures for this topic is,

⭐️Ruth 3:18Then Naomi said to her, “Just be patient, my daughter, until we hear what happens. (The man won’t rest) until he has settled things today.”

Sis, you have got to be still & wait on God! Stop worrying about a husband! Ruth got all excited, telling Naomi, “Boaz is going to do this & Boaz is going to do that!” However, Naomi’s response was rooted in wisdom, she simply told Ruth to be still.

In other words,

(Calm down honey!)

It is not your job to worry if a man is going to marry you or not. According to scripture, it’s the mans job not to rest until he has made you his wife!!

Can you imagine the damage that could have caused, if I would’ve gotten all excited, started attending this mans ministry meetings & got myself attached to the idea of him being my husband!?!

Lord Jesus that could’ve turned into a sticky situation!!

Not only that, but let’s just say: “hypothetically speaking.” I would’ve caught this mans attention & we would’ve started dating.

Who’s to say w
e would have even liked each other or been happy together?

Sis, I’m telling you! You want who God has for you! Not someone else’s husband! I’ve heard many sad stories of people getting married & having terrible marriages, simply because they listened to a spiritual adviser vs. listening to God.

When Abraham sent his servant out to find a wife for Isaac, the servant didn’t ask another servant what he should do? He got down on his knees & asked the only one he knew would give him the right answer.

GOD!

Genesis 24: 12-15— Then he prayed, “Lord, God of my master Abraham, make me successful today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a young woman, ‘Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too’—let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master.”

Before he had finished praying, Rebekah not only came out, but she did everything the servant prayed for! In that confirmation alone, he knew God had answered his prayers!

With that being said, what I’m trying to relay to you, is that if anyone has told you,

Girl, Carlos may be your husband!”
or,
Those dreams mean he’s going to marry you!”

PRAY!!!

Talk it over with God & trust His leading! Not “mans.” People can look at two people and say all day long,

  • Ooh! He’ll be good for her!” Or
  • She’ll be real good for him!”

But honey please

If God ain’t hooked it up. I wont be in it! You’ll find yourself in a (Hooked up Hot Mess) if you listen to people.

3. What Did God Say??? 

I know this may seem like a simple question; but many women (especially in the body of Christ) allow their emotions to guide them instead of the Holy Spirit!

Just because you see a man & admire him doesn’t mean God will give him to you.

I don’t care how much you pray for him, if it is not in God’s will for your life. It will not happen! 

That’s why, when you pray 🙏🏽, you should always pray, “Lord let your will be done in my life, not mine.

I remember reading this story about a woman who went through the, “The Lord told me who my husband was experience.

In her story she stated:

There was this finnneee brother that joined church. Every single women that saw him, wanted him! She said, he couldn’t even get in the church building good before women put their purses down claiming the seat next to him. She even thought some of the things they did to get his attention were extreme.
However, one day after service, she went home, went to bed and found herself dreaming about this same man! In her dream, she said both of them were holding hands and smiling at one another. The next morning she woke up & thought “Wow God! He must be my husband!

After this dream, she started going to church more and doing exactly what all the other women were doing before her. But to her surprise this man never acknowledged her or any other woman for that matter.

Finally, after many months of chasing this man & trying to subliminally inform him that she was his wife. She went and talked to someone at the church about it.

Turns out, 10 other women in church had the same dream.

The story ends with the man not marrying any of them.

He actually married someone else…

Ladies… that situation from the very beginning was rooted in confusion! God was not the author of that! Sis, God loves you too much for that!

The bible says in Isaiah,

10 At the beginning I announce the end,
proclaim in advance things not yet done;
and I say that my plan will hold,
I will do everything I please to do.

So why on earth would he give you a dream & tell you to wait for a man He already knows 7 months down the line is going to marry someone else!! 🤔

Sometimes, you can want something so bad you can (fool yourself ) into thinking God said this or said that, when in fact, God has said nothing

I know that may be hard for some of you to bear, especially if you have wasted years or months believing that God promised you something.

But, the proof of a man being yours is not in a friend request, a follow on periscope, a dream you had or anything else…

The proof is that relationship being manifested in your life. You can dream all you want to! But if God has not established those dreams,

 They will not manifest.

I do not believe it’s Gods will for you to sit around & be hurt year after year, playing the good ole faithful wife, while this man does whatever he wants & you just sit and wait on him to finally “see you.”

No ma’am!

Whatever God has for you, will be established in your life!

The best thing I can tell you to do, is to get as FAR AWAY from that man & the idea of him as you possibly can! Run into the arms of Jesus sis & STAY THERE!! So when your real husband comes, the only way he’ll be able to get you, is to go to God himself & ask for you!!

  • Stop stalking these men
  • Liking all their posts
  • & Re-tweeting every little thing they say!

⭐️NOTE: You are more than a groupie sis! You are somebody’s future wife! 

 Now act like it! 

Just watch! As soon as you start focusing on who you are & what God has given you to do. God will add “the perfect man (meaning the most suitable man for your destiny) to your life!

And he will add him at His perfect timing…..

Now, I do not expect to get many “job well done” comments on this blog. So many women have itching ears for a “prophetic husband word” that they’ve become accustomed to the lies & the foolery that’s going on in the body of Christ.

Nevertheless, I will write & speak everything God gives to me! As you all know from the very first blog I wrote: Three Ways to Know if a Man is “Heaven” sent or “Hell” sent. I tell only the truth & nothing but the truth.

Ladies, I pray this helped you…

I would never say or write anything to hurt you! I want you to walk in God’s best! 🙂 But sometimes the truth has to be told so that you can be set free & do just that!

⭐️Also, if you would like for me & the Holy Ghost (lol) to make an appearance at any special event or occasion, here’s the new “book me” page that’s been added to my website:

 “BOOK TAKYAH”

Simply click on the link and it’ll take you to the form you should fill out if you need me!!

Okay Ladies, I am out of here!!!

Until next time my loves!!!

🌸Takyah Love🌸