⭐️⭐️ THIS BLOG IS RATED: M⭐️⭐️
(For Mature Readers Only)
I bought the dress!
I picked out the wedding colors, and the wedding cake I want!
I know I’m ready to get married now!
So, you want to be married? Okay, I get that. But did you know that marriage is more than “one happy wedding 🎩 day?” While many women spend a lot of time preparing for the wedding, seldom do they prepare for the actual marriage!
In today’s blog, “Wisdom Nuggets for Marriage.” I will discuss practical things that you (a future wife) can use in your future marriage. These little nuggets have been tested, tried and true! The information I am about to share with you have come from women who’ve been Happily married for over 10-50 years!
Let’s get started!
1. Never Go To Bed Angry
This is a tip I already practice regularly, so I have no problem in this area.
When you’re married and your husband does something you don’t like, or something that might’ve embarrassed you, You can’t just “cut him off” as the young folks say. He is not some random guy that you’re talking to, He is your HUSBAND! So cutting him off is not an option!
Neither is withholding your cookies🍪 (but we will discuss this later.)
Anyway, if something happens in your marriage that you don’t like. You have to talk through that thing! You must sit down, write out your feelings on paper and talk it out with your spouse. When you ignore conflict and think things will magically fix themselves in your life, you leave a BIG G__A__P for the enemy to come in and wreak havoc in your marriage.
When you don’t talk things out, assumptions and confusion will come in and fill every gap you didn’t fill.
Ephesians 4:26- “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry,
Hebrews 12:14- Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.
Ladies, if you truly want to have a happy marriage, one of the main key🔑 points I was given for a blissful marriage was to never go to bed angry! Besides, life is too short.
Who knows if tomorrow is promised? If there is something on your heart let it all out, (tactfully of course). Learn to pursue peace with your friends & family right now; then, by the time you get married, “conflict resolution” will be a walk in the park for you.
2. Set a Date Night
My mentor taught me this best. She said, “When you’re married, life will happen. But no matter how much life happens, I still have a date with my hubby to look forward to.”
“Date Night” is a day/night that’s set aside for you & your spouse.
NO ONE ELSE
Although, sometimes you can include your buddies and double/triple date. It’s typically a day for you and your spouse.
⭐️Note: Date night keeps the fire going in your marriage.
Throughout the busy week, you can be at ease because you know that on Friday Night you will be unwinding and escaping life’s pressures in the arms of your hubby (without any interruptions).
And date night does not have to be the same old (dinner+movie) thing! Spice it up a bit! One week go out to a pizza🍕parlor, go painting🎨 and end the night with a slow dance💃🏽🕺🏾at a jazz club🎷.
The next week, go play volleyball 🏐 or golf together!
Go Get Some Delicious Hamburgers!
Then, End The Date at a Race Car Track!
I don’t know! lol 🤷🏽♀️
What I do know, however, is that there are so many activities you can do with your spouse to keep your marriage fresh and fun! It does not have to be routine and it does not have to be the same old, same old. Do something unexpectedly on one of your date nights and surprise your spouse!
⭐️Note: Never stop Dating your spouse. When you stop dating them your marriage can become stale very quickly.
3. Respect Your Hubby’s Bodily Needs
There will come a day sis…
Believe it or not…
When your man will not want to do the do…
I know that sounds so unrealistic, but I’ve been told… it’s true.
Men get tired just like women do. But understanding that your husband is tired or going through some things in his own life will help make your husbands “No, not tonight baby.” a little easier. The quicker you understand that his body changes just like yours does, the less likely you’ll be to get upset, feel rejected, or jump to the conclusion that he has a side-piece he’s giving it to.
Instead of doing any of those things or making him feel less of a man on days when his (stuff) doesn’t quite work, offer him a back rub or a foot rub, maybe make his favorite dessert and empathize.
Listen to him, and let him know whatever he’s going through is totally normal! Let him know that you’ll wait until he’s ready! Also, making love to one another is not a game. You don’t withhold your cookies from your husband because he didn’t give you any on the day you wanted it. (He could’ve really been tired or fatigued that day). Don’t play games or try to be tit for tat with your husband. Remember what I said in my last blog, “Marriage Myths.”
⭐️What you don’t do another woman will.
Now, on the other hand…
If it’s been weeks or months!!! 😳😯🤨
You should definitely check into that! Although our bodies change as we get older, (it ain’t that much changing going on)! You should never go that long without touching and being intimate with your spouse, (unless the two of you agree on a fast) and even then, it’s not wise to fast for months at a time!
⭐️1 Corinthians 7:5-Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
I wish my husband would come to me saying, “The Lord then called him on a 3 month fast.” The devil is a lie! God gone have to come down from Heaven and tell me the same thing too! Especially after I been waiting all these years for you! Boy, You better get yo’ tail in this room!😂😂
4. The KING 👑 of TV📺
About a month ago, my nephew was in bed with me and we were watching veggie tales. He saw me reaching for the remote and immediately he went in and grabbed it before I could get it! I guess he thought I was going to change it from veggie tales to some boring adult channel.
Regardless of what he thought, he did NOT LET THE REMOTE GO. He even went to sleep with the remote in his hand, I thought this was the cutest thing ever! So I filmed him sleeping with the remote in his hand and put it on IG.
Although, it’s cute at 1 years old. It may not be so cute at 30. Here you are about to watch Oprah and your husband (who is dozing off) wakes up out of his sleep and swears he was still watching TV. Although this may seem trivial, I’ve been told the remote has actually caused a lot of arguments in marriage. Instead of getting upset, be wise sis!
⭐️Record your program, and go back and watch it later.
If you’re like me a (book reader) then don’t worry about this step. This step is to help out the women who enjoy watching TV as well. If you know your husband is a bit of a TV hog, (usually men are) then set a schedule, where the two of you can both watch what you want without having to clash.
5. Healthy Hubby Is a Happy Hubby
Your husband is fine, in shape and looking so good in his suit!
And you want to keep him that way…right?
When it comes to eating most men love to grub, (I do to) if I can be honest. However, you don’t want to be burying your husband at 50. You want him to live a long and healthy life.
Taking care of your husbands health, is vital to marriage! You have to watch out for him, because knowing what I know about men, he probably won’t watch out for himself. Making sure that he goes to the doctor regularly, takes his multi-vitamins and has regular bowel movements💩 is all apart of a wife’s duties.
But seriously sis, men have a shorter life span than women naturally, so you want to help e-x-p-a-n-d the life he has, not help take him out of here.
If you’re a woman that knows how to throw down in the kitchen, go ahead and throw down sis! But do it in moderation! When I get married, this is what me and husbands weekly chart will be, Mon-Thursday we will eat healthy! Eating things like grilled chicken, fish, salads, smoothies and exercising on those days as well. But Friday-Sunday we will enjoy ourselves! If we want pasta, wings or some good desserts then we will do that!
However, there has got to be a balance! Your husband cannot eat like a pig and expect to fly like a eagle the rest of the week. Switch out some of his bad eating habits for good ones. And your hubby will improve in every area of his life! Including the bedroom!
6. Never LAUGH AT YOUR HUSBAND
So you’re sitting at a dinner table with your friends. And one of them cracks a joke about your husband. Maybe his teeth aren’t all the way straight and they refer to him as “Bucky from Fat Albert.”
Although you may have thought the joke was hilarious!!!
Do not laugh!!! I repeat DO NOT LAUGH!!
If you know your husband has insecurities about his teeth, or is trying to get them fixed and you know that joke hurt his feelings. Don’t laugh!
Most of the time men will come back with a check or two themselves and it’ll be all fun and games, but if your husband is not laughing. Neither should you. Follow his lead. Or better yet, when men start that crazy checking game that they do ever so often, simply get up and chill with the ladies!
Just in case one of them says something that cuts a little deep, you do not want to be caught in that cross fire and you definitely don’t want your husband to be angry at you saying things like: “Oh, so you think that’s funny huh?”
⭐️NOTE: Laughing at your husband in public, will get you put out in private.
I heard that from an old lady once and it stuck with me till this day!
And last but not least…
7. What Happens At Home Stays At Home
If your husband upsets you, you do not get to leave your house, and go stay with your parents! There are a lot of immature women who get married and when their husband does something that offends them, instead of talking it out, they run and tell everybody what’s going on and they make a big scene out of everything!
Sis if you’re behaving in this manner, you are definitely not ready for marriage!
For one, it’s disrespectful to your husband for his business to be out there in the streets like that, and guess what else? When your back all lovey-dovey and kissing on your hubby again, your family/mom/girl-friends will still be holding a grudge against him! (for something that you have completely forgiven and forgotten about)
Stick it out sis! Keep your butt at home! If you need to vent, tell it to Jesus! (you know He’s always listening). After that, call a responsible marriage accountability partner, like a mentor, or someone who’s been married longer than you, and get advice from them.
If that’s still not enough, vent your feelings in a journal, or do like I do (write a song about it). But whatever you need to do to get your emotions out, do that! Then, when you have CALMED DOWN (all the way) go speak with your husband about what he did & how it made you feel. Talking bad about your hubby and dragging his name down, makes not only him look bad, but you as well.
⭐️NOTE: Don’t air your dirty laundry, clean it.
That’s all for today!
If I give you any more information, I’m gonna have to charge you for it! (lol)
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Next week the blog will be dedicated towards MEN as I give them knowledge on how to love their Wives!
I pray you all enjoyed the blog!
Until next time my loves!
Takyah Love 💕